I worry that in the process of drinking, grilling, and setting off small explosives we might forget the one, true meaning of the Fourth of July:
Sticking it to Britain.
No, really, fuck those guys.
Fuck redcoats.
Fuck taxation without representation.
Fuck the Boston Massacre.
Fuck the Stamp Act.
Fuck their fucking accents.
Fuck their fucking tea.
Fuck the fucking queen.
Fuck their fucking...
[read more]
I worry that in the process of drinking, grilling, and setting off small explosives we might forget the one, true meaning of the Fourth of July:
Sticking it to Britain.
No, really, fuck those guys.
Fuck redcoats.
Fuck taxation without representation.
Fuck the Boston Massacre.
Fuck the Stamp Act.
Fuck their fucking accents.
Fuck their fucking tea.
Fuck the fucking queen.
Fuck their fucking soccer team.
Fuck Canada.
Fuck Labor.
Fuck Tories.
Fuck David Attenborough.
Come get in touch with the true meaning of Independence Day, culminating in a burning in effigy of the Queen Mother. Bring some food to grill. We always need more hamburgers and hot dogs and vegetable-protein-based versions thereof.
******** NO BRITISH BEER WILL BE ALLOWED. AMERICAN BEER ONLY. ********