FOR ALL FUTURE CRITICISISM AND REQUESTS FOR INTERVIEWS... SUCK IT
Suit Up and Shut Up
Seattle Santarchy PUBMARCH DEATHCRAWL Fun Jet and/or Fear/Beer, Going Rogue, (Its a Trap!): You Asked For It Period Stop. No, Really. Stop. Ho10
And you know what that means... SANTACON! Get out that Santa suit. Don't forget to not wash it. Fill up your flasks and grab some elves because its SANTA TIME!
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[read more] FOR ALL FUTURE CRITICISISM AND REQUESTS FOR INTERVIEWS... SUCK IT
Suit Up and Shut Up
Seattle Santarchy PUBMARCH DEATHCRAWL Fun Jet and/or Fear/Beer, Going Rogue, (Its a Trap!): You Asked For It Period Stop. No, Really. Stop. Ho10
And you know what that means... SANTACON! Get out that Santa suit. Don't forget to not wash it. Fill up your flasks and grab some elves because its SANTA TIME!
What is Santacon?
For those new Santas, what you need to know is this. Santa can't do what Santa needs to do the night of Dec. 24th without some recon work. So Santa checks out who's been naughty in cities all over the world in the month of December... and sometimes in July. So we suit up and go on a merry adventure drinking as much as we can and spreading jolly cheer. All you need is a pair of good walking shoes, a Santa outfit and the location of where and when to show up and you're good to go!
Basically its about the funnest thing you could possibly do with your time so don't even think about not showing up.
Wait... is it Santarchy or Santacon? I'm confused.
Yes.
WHERE IS SEATTLE SANTARCHY 2010?
Fremont TROLL @ NOON Sat. Dec 18th (Troll Ave, Seattle, WA 98103)
Remember... Santa will be on the move by 12:30 sharp! So show up early or on-time to be sure not to lose Santa. If you can't make it on time you can probably find the red horde meandering through Fremont.
The 4 F*s of Santacon:
1. Santa does not f* with kids
2. Santa does not f* with police
3. Santa does not f* with security
4. Santa does not f* with Santa
Other conventions of Santacon:
- Follow Santa
- No Santa Left Behind! Keep track of your Santa friends.
- Don't wash the suit! Your Disgusting Santa suit is a badge of honor. Wear it proudly.
- Bars can be crowded. Its best to carry a backup plan (cough*flask!)
- Follow Santa
What are the answers to these stupid questions?
Q: Who are you?
A: SANTA!
A: ELVIS!
Q: Where are you from?
A: North of here a bit...
A: The North Pole!
A: I guess this is what happens when you eat a York Peppermint Patty on the North Pole
Q: Why are you dressed like that?
A: Red and White is the new Black and Denim
A: To spread the good word of Santa & Socialism
Q: What are you doing here?
A: Mrs. Claus kicked me out.
A: You're not my mother!
A: Looking for some hot elf action.
A: What are YOU doing here?
A: My sleigh broke down.
A: Trying to steal change from Unicef DING DING DING!
Santa's Little Workshop:
Santacon is a great time for Santa to try out new toys, so whether you've got Naughty and Nice Stickers, Spray Snow, Naughty Cristmas Carols, Stuffed Animal flasks, GIANT candy canes, A Beer hat with candy cane striped straws, New Santa outfits... Santacon is the place to try all that stuff out. Santa loves creativity. If you don't do any of that... don't worry you can always drink.
Ok... I'm IN... where do I get a suit?
Last minute Santas have been known to find suits at Party City. Costume shops should carry them seasonally. Yucky Santas can find them at Walmart so I'm told... and Santa can also GOOGLE for santa suit and find many other options.
Practicalities:
Santa doesn't care how good you look in those shoes, leave them home and wear something comfy on your feet. December is cold... make sure you have something warm to wear even if your santa "suit" is skimpy.
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